a colored spectrum

rain on you.

you were listening to Corrine May and thought of her again.
with the storm outside your window and the rain lashing by...
sometimes i have nothing to say to you, but i feel sad when i see you sad.
when i hear you sigh, i want to know what's weighing on your mind.
i know you miss her. i can't tell you to stop. i don't think you're foolish.
except i don't know what else to think or to say to you already.

maybe the break-up with her after one year is good for you.
i told you that God has plans for all of us and His door is never closed.
i'm very glad that you've quit smoking for a week and chewing on nicotine gum.
walk close to Lord Jesus, come back to His flock.
i'm glad you're reading books, novels and Newsweek.
i'm so afraid that your brain will degenerate into mush. thankfully not.
sometimes i wonder why do i care so much about what happens to your life...
coz it's YOUR life.

we alwiz say to each other "don't be silly".
think about it, we've never really threw temper or flared up at each other.
everytime something went wrong, we immediately apologized even it wasn't our fault.
everything's been tacful and diplomatic. why? "don't be silly." good advice.
i wonder why you like asking me about what i wrote about my latest paper, describe my content, share with you my analysis etc... why?
does that give you a sense of being involved in my life; of being around; of knowing me better?
you're just the same as Dad. never being there but kinda there. it's intangible anyway.

i was pondering on what you told me. about what you did with her.
i thought.. how can people be attracted to and interested in more than 1 person at a time?
isn't love and its concomitant responsibilities supposed to make love relationships special?
well.. i guess not. cross-cultural studies states that it is only in Western societies that establish a structure of binary opposite in relationships to maintain social order and render the institution of marriage as based on the Church as legitimate and sacred.

the notion of romantic love sells Hollywood movies, 'marry the one you love'. right...
in reality.. it is possible to love a few people at a time. marry someone you don't love but have a responsibility towards. love comes second to responsibilities towards family, society and self.

how can people have one nite stands with their best friends and move on with life?
why do some people intrude into other's blissful marriage to steal a partner?
why do others cheat on their spouse?

i think these are all possible. there's no answer to how can or why.
it just happens. primarily, human beings are self-centered creatures.
partly it's moral degradation, largely is coz people can never be totally sure of what they want.
thus they're often caught in a web of ambivalence. often, they're not ready to commit themselves and self-sacrifice to keep a relationship and/or marriage together too.
the self-interests prioritizes their pleasure higher than the commitment to a partner.

the end. divorce. extra-marital affairs. promiscuous sex. hurting somebody who loves you.

posted by Veen @ 01:35